Do you know why people don’t like you?. Do you care?. I know. You can’t please everyone, and trying to do so, usually means you end up pleasing no-one. However, aren’t you just a teensy weeny bit curious to know why some people.. despite all of your awesomeness, just can’t flipping stand you.
I know I was.
You see, I’ve always convinced myself that it didn’t matter what others thought. In fact, some people use this as some kind of Mantra.. however, as human beings, I believe we do want to be liked.
Even if we give the impression to others that “we couldn’t care less”. Our unique personality is going to endear some people to us like bees around a honeypot, whilst downright pi**ing off others..
So, why is that?.
It simply comes down to behavioural style. (involving, relating to, or emphasising behaviour).
Behavioural style. is the reason we tend to like or dislike someone. When the styles differ, and one person is not understanding the other person’s behavioural style, this usually causes a negative reaction.
So, why then is it, opposites attract?. Opposites attract if one person understands the other person’s behavioural style. When two people live together who are complete opposites, they thrive only if and when, they appreciate the other person’s uniqueness.
Hence, this is why you see many couples fail. Mainly because one partner attempts to ignore this rule and constantly attempts to change the other person to be “more like them”.
Like attracts like. We tend to like people like us. When people are like us, they tend to “like us”. So, in order to get more people to like you, and less people to “not like you”, here is what you can do.
- Learn to stop judging people who behave differently from you. Different does not make them wrong, it only makes them different from you. Learn to appreciate the other point of view, even if you disagree with it
- Even if you are rapidly climbing the ladder of success (in your eyes), stay humble. Success does not make us any better than the next person, it only makes us more able to help the next person.
- We are not in competition with others, we are only in competition with ourselves. Blaming others is not an attractive trait. People who blame others, and whine and moan at every opportunity, tend only to attract other negative people who “get off” on doing the same.
- Give people something to admire. When life is good to you, pay it forward, you never know the effect you are having on other people. A few kind words at the right time can change another person’s World. Use words wisely.
- Stop talking about YOU all the time. People get so sick and tired of people who can’t stop talking about themselves all the time. The magic word is “You”. This word matters to others, more than any other word.
We’re obviously not going to get everyone to like us. Some people just don’t like anyone. However, you can apply the five points above and be “more likeable”..
I hope you have found this useful. I think we all tend to get involved in our own little world at times and we forget about others, but it’s other people who actually make up our World, and the more people we can attract in a good way, the more interesting our World becomes. Thoughts?
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Peace and prosperity